Alma 61:9 "you have censured me, but it mattereth not"

In the exchange of epistles between Moroni and Pahoran in Alma 60-61, Pahoran showed an outstanding example of selfless behavior and unity.  In Moroni's epistle, he basically accused, or at least suspected, Pahoran of being guilty of the same selfish, power-seeking behavior as the kingmen. However, Pahoran had been working to defend the cause of freedom and he himself was also suffering in the cause.  The natural man would be offended by this lack of trust and this censure from Moroni.  Pahoran had a great deal of charity. In his response, he showed that he did not care for his own position or power, but for that of freedom.  His response was not about himself at all.  He completely overlooked Moroni's lack of trust and his accusations and looked for the truth in Moroni's message.

As I look for principles of how to be a better husband and father, this exchange provides powerful insights.  Pahoran's response is a good example of how spouses can respond to each other and keep unity in stressful situations.  The key principle reinforced for me is the importance of giving each other the benefit of the doubt when there is disagreement or misunderstanding.  Do not look for perceived slights or lack of respect, but rather look for the good that is offered.  The way Pahoran did this was to remember the greatness of Moroni's heart.  Pahoran realized that Moroni had no way to know exactly who was at fault in the government, so he was very strong with his words.  But in his heart, Moroni never intended to accuse anyone that was innocent.  If I remember the greatness of my wife's heart, I will remember she is not trying to injure me when we disagree or there is a misunderstanding.  I will remember that we are on the same team, and are trying to accomplish the same objectives.  I will not get defensive, but strive to work together.  Another key to remember is that just like Moroni and Pahoran, we simply don't always have the same view of the field or the obstacles we face.  That can be a strength, if we are able to give each other the benefit of the doubt.  Even though Moroni's interpretation of Pahoran's situation may not have been fully accurate, Moroni taught powerful principles about the importance of unity and how to rectify their situation (I also learned great principles about being a better father and how to have more unity in marriage from Moroni's letter).  Because Pahoran was able to look past the 'censure', he was able to implement the good in Moroni's counsel, and they were able to work together in unity against their real common foe, and not waste their energy protecting their pride.  For me, this means that as spouses, we look for solutions together.  We rely on each other's strengths and overlook and forgive weaknesses. We take the good in each other's ideas to work together for a common goal.  Working together brings us to Christ, whereas protecting our pride divides us and allows the enemy to gain victories.

Alma 48:9 "in their weakest fortifications he did place the greater number of men"

The war chapters of Alma have many principles teaching me how to be a better husband and father, and how to better prepare myself and my family against the enemy that tries to destroy us.  The preparation of Moroni in chapters 48-50 of Alma was impressive.  Moroni is a type of Christ and Amalakiah is a type of Satan.  Amalakiah's whole intent was to bring the Nephites into bondage.  To have power over them.  To make them suffer.  Moroni's entire intent was to strengthen the Nephites and to keep, or deliver them from bondage.  Like Amalakiah, Satan is familiar with us and our weaknesses.  He appoints his legions to attack us where we are weakest.  Like Moroni, I must strengthen my cities.  My people.  My family.  I must prepare them for the battle before the enemy attacks and I must encourage and help them in the battles.  Moroni placed the greatest number of men in the weakest places.  For myself, I can apply this by placing the greatest focus and efforts into overcoming my greatest weaknesses.  If I put forth real effort, the Lord will strengthen me in my weakness.  For my family, I can know each family member and their strengths and weaknesses.  I can put individualized efforts into strengthening each one in their greatest places of weakness.  As I learned from Alma (Alma 36-42), I do not need to spend the same amount of time teaching each child the same thing.  Some will need more focus in some areas than others.  I need to discern what they need and how I can best help strengthen them individually.  This takes great effort and diligence.  I need to be better.

The Nephites had faith "that God would make it known unto them whither they should go to defend themselves against their enemies" (Alma 48:16).  If I am faithful in keeping the commandments, God will make it known unto me whither I should go to defend my family against the adversary.  He will give me spiritual guidance and direction regarding where I need to strengthen or what I need to fight against.  I have seen this to be true in my life.  I have recently received guidance about things to discuss individually with my children to help strengthen them individually.

In chapter 50, we read that in a brief period of peace, Moroni did not stop preparing and strengthening his cities.  It mentions at least 5 levels of security he put in place.  I also need to continually be diligent in preparing myself and my family spiritually, especially in times of relative peace.  I need to be diligent in applying multiple layers of security.  I find verses 22 and 23 of Alma 50 especially comforting.  We read that "those who were faithful in keeping the commandments of the Lord were delivered at all times", and that "there never was a happier time among the people of Nephi".

It is interesting that in the midst of the war with the Lamanites, this is the happiest period of time that the Nephites had experienced to this point.  What created this happiness?  They were still in danger.  Amalakiah was still determined to destroy them.  But they had peace, happiness and prosperity.  They had deliverance from the Lord from their sin and unhappiness.  I think much of this had to do with the preparations Moroni had them make, coupled with the spiritual preparations they made - the heed and diligence they gave to the word of God (Alma 49:3).  In my life, I think this can also be true.  There can be chaos around me.  Forces of evil can be seeking to destroy me.  But if I keep fortifying myself with personal study, prayer, service, etc., I can have peace and prosperity in my heart, despite all the craziness around me.  The same can be true in my family if we all work toward this end.

Alma 35:6 "those who were in favor of the words....were cast out"

After Alma, Amulek, and their brethren had finished teaching the gospel to the Zoramites, those that believed were treated very poorly by the rest of their people, and they were cast out of the land.  I was reminded that exercising faith unto repentance and obedience does not always produce what appears on the outside to be a beneficial result.  These people were cast out.  The people of Ammonihah were burned.  The people who followed Alma the Elder had to flee and were eventually in bondage.  Why does the Lord allow people to have so much affliction when they are trying to follow Him?  At face value, it would seem these accounts might discourage us from turning to the Lord!  But, if we keep in mind what the Lord is trying to do for us, the purpose of us being on earth, it makes a little more sense.  As we turn to Him, sometimes He gives us greater opportunities to exercise faith and to become more like Him.  Sometimes He allows us to have additional trials to further strengthen us.  Sometimes He lets us suffer afflictions to strengthen others.  When we truly have charity, we are ok with that (e.g., the people of Ammon being slain and touching the hearts and sparking the conversion of more Lamanites than had been slain).  Sometimes, like in this example, He lets the wicked exercise their agency and cause affliction of the righteous.  But He always delivers us spiritually as we exercise faith.  And He often delivers us temporally if we exercise faith.  As we become truly converted, we learn to trust in His deliverance, whatever that may be.  The deliverance that really matters is the deliverance from the chains of Satan that bind our hearts and keep us from reaching our full potential.  Not deliverance from difficulties in life.  Often these difficulties help us be more fully delivered spiritually.  And when we turn to the Lord, we always prosper in the ways that truly matter - we become more like Him, and we experience greater inner love, peace and joy.

Alma 26:27: "we were about to turn back"

I was touched as I read of the afflictions of Ammon and his brethren as they were working to take the blessings of the gospel to the Lamanites.  It struck me that these men became depressed because of their afflictions, so much so, that they were about to turn back.  So many times in life I have given up, or have been tempted to give up on a worthy pursuit when things got difficult.  It is tempting to look at others and think that if they do something well, it must come easily to them.  Even these greatest of missionaries in the Book of Mormon were tempted to give up and turn back when they got discouraged.  Think of what would have happened if these men had turned back and not completed their work among the Lamanites!  Many thousands of souls would not have received the light of the gospel.  The men likely would never have known what they missed out on had they turned back. No one would have blamed them.  In fact, most thought they were crazy to go in the first place.  But look what good came of sticking with it through their afflictions!  The Lord comforted them as they exercised faith and they were able to persevere through very difficult times.  Now look at their joy.  And the joy of so many others through their efforts.  It is worth it to stick with it through the hardest times, in worthy pursuits.  To do this, my heart must be soft like their hearts were soft. Their hearts were such that they were ok with their afflictions if there was a chance they could just help someone see the Lord.  I need to remember this in my afflictions, however great or small.  I am thankful for the patience and long-suffering of the Lord. He continually forgives me and gives me opportunities to grow and make better decisions going forward.  Amazing chapter.

Alma 19: "to me he doth not stink"

After King Lamoni had fallen to the earth as if he were dead, the Queen demonstrated some good principles that can be applied to marriage. First, when her husband was in apparent trouble, she sought help from the priesthood leader. Ammon could, and did, help her in a number of ways. Just like priesthood holders and leaders can help us when we are having difficulties. We can receive counsel, strength, perspective and healing from our priesthood leaders. The queen demonstrated great faith in her actions here. Exercising great faith on behalf of our spouse and those we love can be very beneficial.

Additionally, she did not give up on her husband when he was 'down'. Clearly he was in a troubling spot. Many around him had given up on him. It sounds like he actually stunk like he was dead. But his wife could see through the difficulties. She stood by him and did everything in her power to help him. She refused to smell his stink. She was there in his difficulties, and this allowed her to also be there and experience the great joy he also received through his deliverance. This is a great example of how to be a loving spouse. Too often, we see the opposite. Spouses complaining about the stink of their mate to others, rather than overlooking it and exercising faith in their behalf.

Later in the account, she continued to show her faith by watching over her husband until he awoke, as promised by Ammon. When he awoke he blessed God and then he blessed his wife. She was a great support and blessing to him. I am thankful for a spouse that is a great support and blessing to me, and who so often overlooks my stink. I desire the strength to be this kind of spouse.

Alma 11:46 "the people began again to be astonished, and also Zeezrom began to tremble"

As I read the account of Alma and Amulek preaching to the people of Ammonihah, I pondered the question, "What reached Zeezrom"?  He was a very learned and logical man.  He was very confident in his abilities to debate and persuade.  But at some point in his interaction with Amulek, the Spirit began to reach him.  What led to this?  It was not that he was impressed by Amulek, a man of 'no small reputation'.  It was not the fact that there are now two witnesses.  He did not seem overly impressed by Amulek's personal experiences with seeing an angel.  It did not seem to be Amulek's reminder that when people choose wickedness they are setting themselves up for destruction.  Even his initial personal accusation that Zeezrom is a child of hell did not seem to be what reached him.  What seemed to get to Zeezrom were the doctrines and testimony of Jesus Christ.  When Amulek taught these doctrines, the Holy Ghost carried them to Zeezrom's heart. And he finally let them in.  Then he began to tremble.  Then he began to acknowledge his guilt.  Then he desired the deliverance of the Savior.  I can apply this in at least two ways.  First, I can humble myself, exercise faith and constantly strive to remember Christ and my constant need for His deliverance.   Second, I can be more bold in my teaching and testifying of the Savior, as prompted by the Spirit.   It is when people are touched by the doctrine of Christ and finally acknowledge their dependence on Him for their eternal happiness that they humble themselves and repent.  We need a consciousness of our own guilt (see verse 1 of Ch 12).  Other things we learn about Zeezrom in the next chapter - he is convinced more and more of the power of God; he began to inquire diligently.  The nature, sincerity and purpose of his questions changed.  He began to have a mighty change of heart.  And this man who was so prideful and reliant upon his own wisdom at the beginning of the account was truly converted and delivered by the power of the atonement of Christ.  He went on to be a great missionary, bringing the blessings of the gospel to many.

Mosiah 21-22 "the Lord was slow to hear their cry"

These chapters contain great lessons about receiving spiritual guidance, and the relationship between adversity and spiritual growth.

In the beginning of Mosiah chapter 22, the people of King Limhi tried to deliver themselves from the Lamanites by relying on their own strength and wisdom, without repenting and without seeking the will and help of the Lord.

When this failed miserably (3 times), they finally humbled themselves and cried mightily unto the Lord. How long does it take me?

After crying unto the Lord, He was slow to hear their cries. I do not think this means He wanted to punish them or that He was getting back at them. I think it was for their own good, so that they could complete their repentance and truly change. If it is too easy, we tend to take things for granted and forget. Line upon line, He gives us what we need to grow and develop. And as we stay the course, He does deliver us and give us the spiritual guidance we need. When we begin to seek Him with all our hearts, He prospers us by degrees. I have experienced these principles as I have studied and applied the teachings of the Book of Mormon in my current study. I testify that they are true. I know the Lord delivers me from my sin and weakness as I excercise faith in Him.

As the people were ready, the Lord then sent help and inspiration by sending Ammon. Many times, needed spiritual guidance comes in the vehicle of another person.

The people entered into a covenant that they would serve God and keep His commandments. They desired to be baptized, but because of their new understanding and humility, they waited upon the Lord, until they could receive this by proper authority. The process these people went through required great faith and patience.

At the end of chapter 22, the people, together with the help of Ammon, put all of their study into how they could be delivered from the Lamanites. So chapter 22 comes full circle. At the beginning of the chapter, this was also their sole desire - how to be delivered from the Lamanites. But now, instead of relying solely upon their own strength, they put their faith and trust in the Lord, and with His guidance, they again put all their effort toward the goal at hand. Their understanding and motives were now different. They had grown tremendously through the exercise of faith, patience and humility. They were ready for deliverance and the adversity had blessed them greatly. And the Lord's method of delivering them was very different from their original plans.

Other principles from this account - in the beginning, they were murmuring because of their affliction. Only when they humbled themselves, stopped murmuring, and submitted to their afflictions, did they begin to receive the spiritual guidance they so desired. Murmuring impedes spiritual guidance and growth.

Also, even after their repentance, humility and growth, the Lord still did not simply give them the answer. They had to work hard and put forth effort into thinking up the best approach they could. Then they had to act in faith. The Lord clearly guided them in this process, but not without much effort from the people. The power of counseling is also evident. Limhi did not assume he had all the answers. He counseled with the people. In the end, the plan chosen was put forth by Gideon. Guidance can come from counseling together. This is a good principle for families.